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How to Be a Great First Date
Okay, you've scored a date with a sexy somebody for Saturday night, and you're terrified you're going to blow it. Don't worry; if you follow these tips, you'll do just fine. The bonus? None of them involves getting a face lift or renting a Jaguar for the evening.
1. The key to being a great date is to love yourself. Nothing is more attractive than an individual who regards himself highly. It doesn't matter of you're short, fat, bald or hairy in all the wrong places. You've heard the maxim, "You can't love somebody until you love yourself," and it's true, but nobody else is going to love you until you love yourself, either. Self-love attracts love like a magnet.
2. Resolve to be yourself and only yourself. Don't tell me you're not interesting enough, good-looking enough, smart enough. Ask yourself: Do you want your date to like you for somebody you are or for somebody you aren't? Right. Now, be yourself, and understand that maybe your date will like you and maybe he or she won't. Either way, you'll live. I promise.
3. Visualize quiet confidence. For several days before your date, visualize yourself sitting with him or her and feeling calm, cool, and attractive. Really feel it! See, hear, and feel yourself laughing easily. Feel yourself smiling. Practice this while you're waiting to order your coffee in the company cafeteria. Do it in the Laundromat. Feel it until it feels real.
4. Make a list of all the things you have going for you. A great sense of humor? Compassion? Beautiful teeth? Are you an executive at an up-and-coming company? Write down your desirable qualities and read the list several times a day. Let it sink in. Knowing what makes you special will give you confidence and an inner glow on the big night.
5. Now that you know what makes you wonderful, keep it to yourself. No need to turn the date into an infomercial: Avoid mentioning that you're considered the unofficial mayor of your town because you're so popular. Don't brag about how you trounced Texas Tess in the chili competition. Allow your date to make little discoveries about you. Trust him or her to see that you're an excellent catch.
6. View your shortcomings as positives. A healthy person will be drawn to you despite the fact that you drive a 1987 Chevette, as long as you're kind, considerate, and funny. If you're ten pounds overweight, there are people who will find you sexy because they'll perceive you as being slightly indulgent. If you're a man who's balding and consider it a disadvantage, decide to make it an advantage. Many women see a disappearing hairline as a sign of virility.
7. Have reasonable expectations of the other person. What's more revolting than a paunchy guy who expects his girlfriend to look like Paris Hilton? Or, a woman in a dead-end job who turns her nose up at the guy driving the 1987 Chevette? If you want to find somebody who will like you for you, be sure to return the favor.
8. Don't stereotype. All women are not desperate to get married. All men do not fear commitment. Purge your noggin of the nonsense the media have fed you about the opposite sex. Look your date in the eye and treat him like a human being, not like somebody you must manipulate. Treat your date as you would have him or her treat you. You will be successful beyond your wildest dreams.
9. Remember, it's a date, not a job interview. Don't view this person as a potential spouse. Remove the pressure. See him or her as an acquaintance you'd like to turn into a friend. That's it. Break the ice with a compliment, but avoid making overly personal remarks like, "Wow, you look hot in those pants." Something non-threatening like, "Nice shirt," works well because it conveys that you think your date has good taste!
10. Stay away from sex. I don't care if you're a man or a woman, sex on the first date is bad news. Don't even think about it! Having sex on the first date sets up all sorts of weird and uncomfortable expectations. Furthermore, you could end up with a deadly disease. Hit the sheets only after you're sure you're both healthy, and that you actually like the other person. It makes for much better sex.
11. Accept the possibility that you'll be rejected. Maybe you and your sexy somebody will hit it off. Maybe you won't. When I was single, I often reminded myself that even Bruce Springsteen (the biggest, sexiest rock star of the time) faced rejection by the opposite sex at one time or another. So have Britney Spears, Brad Pitt, and all the other luminaries we've been trained to envy. Everybody faces rejection. Everybody. Not just you!
After the date is over, decide whether you'd like to see this individual again. Stop fretting that you didn't make a good enough impression and ask yourself if you even liked him or her. Review the evening dispassionately. Is he or she someone you would choose for a friend? Did you feel good around this person?
If not, it's probably best to move on.
If the answer is yes, proceed accordingly.
Terry Hernon MacDonald is the author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Visit her website at http://www.marrysmart.com.
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8 Deadly Dating Mistakes To Avoid!
Are you dating or in a serious relationship? Did you realize that very often we make the same dating mistakes over and over again? As outlined in my book "the Ultimate Online Dating Handbook" sometimes these mistakes can lead to losing the date of our dreams, or possibly being in a bad relationship. I've compiled a list of dating No-nos which will help you identify a possible problem that you can work on to improve your dating experience.
From Friend To Boyfriend
One of the most frequent questions I am asked is "How do I go from being a friend to being a boyfriend?". I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that this is easy to do, but it can be done.
CyberCheapskates and Net Gold Diggers
Did you know that Match.com has around twelve million members, but only a million or so of those listed have paid their dues? The most asked questions from Romance Clients? "Why don't they answer my emails?" Well, first off, you don't know and never will.
Public Displays of Affection: How to Fake It
You see it all the time, and it makes you want to puke. You're telling them to 'Get a Room!' The problem is, the girl by your side secretly wishes you were slobbering on her.
The Huge Advantages of Online Dating
Imagine the joy of finding the love of your life, an exciting romantic liaison or a rewarding friendship when you are looking and feeling your worst. You had a hellish time at work the previous day, you feel as though you haven't slept a wink, your skin would be a voyage of exploration for a dermatologist and a crow would be more than happy nesting in your hair.
Love Notes: What DoYou Mean? Secrets of Clear Communication
Recently a man I had met through match.com sent me an email and asked "What's your situation now?" I wondered what he meant.
Instant Dating Strategies Anyone Can Use
Most of us walk around caught up in our own thoughts. We don't look at people as we walk down the street and we have the radio blasting in the car so we don't even notice those single, sexy individuals in the cars next to us.
Fatal Flaws- How to Have a Happy Relationship and Keep Your Values Intact
If you are knee deep in trying to find a relationship, maintain or sustain a relationship then you need to think seriously about your Fatal Flaws. Not your own mind you, but those that are demonstrated by that really cute guy/girl you are considering getting into "bed" with, literally and figuratively.
What You Must Know About Dating a Non Christian
Inevitably, when the topic of dating comes up among Christian teens, the question that always seems to come up is, "Can I date a non-Christian?"Most of the time, the typical verse that is used to answer their question is 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, which says, "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?"Knowing that you aren't supposed to date non Christians is one thing, but actually understanding why the Lord doesn't want you to date and marry a non Christian is another matter, so let's look some of the reasons why you aren't supposed to date an unbeliever.
The Right Dating Strategy
So, you have decided to do it. Get out there to the cyber space and try you luck.
Probably you do have attitude, but what is it? Jaded, self-protective? Frightened? Is "scared to death" too strong?What you want, a plan to get there, and an attitude to match is vital for partnering success. Think about it: if you are sure that what you are doing won't work, chances are very good that you will be right.
10 Tips for Seniors Dating Online
We would like to take a few minutes of your time to discuss safety while using online dating websites. While online dating is safe, fun and affordable, it also can bring unwanted attention in many ways.
How To Have Sex On A First Date
Guys have all different motives for trying to be successful with women. Personally, I love relationships, because why would I want to sleep with a chick just once?A lot of other guys just go for one night stands.
Dating Tips that Work- Which of the Three Types of Women Should You be Dating?
When most "dating gurus" and sex therapists spout their dating tips, they often complicate the whole process with unusable theory and psychobabble.I'm going to bypass that, make it brain-dead simple for you, and most importantly, reveal a few dating tips you can apply in the real world.
How Did Online Dating Become So Popular?
SpeedTry to picture what used to happen earlier in the days when people had to depend on the good ol' postal system. During those days, a person had to wait for one or two days for a letter to get across to a person who lived in the same state itself.
Safe Cyber Dating
Cyber dating is one of the most popular dating venues these days. No longer is it necessary to go to the bar down the street to find a date.
Is it Lust or Love -- How to Tell the Difference
Far too many people, both men and women alike, confuse lust for love. Physical attraction alone will not withstand the test of time in relationships.
How To Find A Dating Web Site That Is Right For You Today Starting From Scratch
So at last you're sick and tired of the bar scene, and now you want to find a dating web site that's right for you, but you don't know where to begin! No worries let us take you through a few options available and see what dating site will fit your plans!Now the first step you may want to do, is write down on a piece of paper the key tools you're most interested in using, and the ones that will assist you in reaching the right dating community online.You might think this is not an important step, but what this does is eliminates the dating sites that have unnecessary products that won't help in your search for the right people, whether it's to meet friends, or a life long partner for love and possible marriage.
Online Dating Tips - Creating Personal Ads
Creating a personal ad for online dating services is not difficult, but how well you write your personal ads will often be the difference between success and failure in online dating. All the rules that apply to advertising in business still apply, and those who define and attract their target audience will be the successful ones.
Dating Advice: Common Interest Results in Happy Marriages
How often do your married friends complain about husbands who spend weekends on the couch watching games? Did they not notice these guys were sports fanatics while they were dating? Did they think things would change after the wedding?Life is fraught with ups and downs, so it's critical to marry someone you can have fun with, today and fifty years from now. Here's how you can find that person:1.